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" (definitely not
butch, though) might fit me. Despite my size, 'pert' has never been
said of me, thank God. I'm also definitely not the cheerleader type.
My friends all say I am unconventionally attractive. Back home in
Indiana, I never had trouble attracting men, even men who like conven-
tional movie star-type beauty, but then, most of the boys in my home
town were such jerks I didn't bother much. And all the conventional
movie star type beauties left as soon as they could. So did everyone
else. So did I. Even an ostrich would have left.
In my home town three bowling shirts is considered a complete
wardrobe. The guys were more interested in cars and beer. It was
unmanly for these types to actually talk to a woman; getting the
attention of one of these specimens just wasn't worth it, believe me.
Sort of like saddling a cow: it can be done, but it's a lot of work
and what's the point? These bucolic wags would stand around the back
of a pickup and belch witticisms like "No man should plant more garden
than his woman can hoe," and then guffaw. Then some buffoon so dim he
hadn't heard that one before would laugh and spray beer out through
his nose.
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